GONE IN SOIXANTE SECONDS
So farewell then, Pierre Sage. Many coaches leave under a cloud, not many have their departures completely obscured by the foul, retch-inducing one emanating from another team’s managerial circus, but such was Sage’s fate. The news section of Crystal Palace’s website helpfully tells you the amount of time it might take you to read each story it links through to. For example it should take four minutes or so to get through Tuesday’s “On this day: five big Crystal Palace birthdays”. “England: I love a knee slide!” will take you five. “Prize draw: be a mascot for our next [Bigger Vase] tie!” is a two-minute job. The statement informing the world of Sage’s exit? One minute. Eighty-three words. By way of illustration, the word “words” was the 84th of this paragraph. Just because the man’s French doesn’t mean his exit should be marked with a shrug.
His supporters, such as they are, would argue he was hobbled by knack, suspensions and poor transfer dealings, and approximately nothing went to plan for the man who just six months ago was revelling in being named Ligue 1 coach of the year. His philosophy just never quite translated. “There are two types of teams: one with the ball, and the other chasing it,” he said last year. “I prefer to be the first of those.” And it is true that in Ligue 1 last season only Paris St-Germain and Marseille had, on average, more of the ball than his Lens side. But it turned out that Crystal Palace players were quite happy chasing it thank you, whichever of them he picked – and he picked most of them, fielding more players than any other club this season.
They are averaging 43.2% possession, more than only Coventry and Hull. Against Tottenham at the end of October – when, to be fair, they were hobbled by a 13th-minute red card – they had the ball just 20.8% of the time – which, at least since 2013-14, they’ve never come close to equalling – and ended with an xG of 0.14 – not as bad as the 0.12 they registered against Manchester City in August 2022 (a game which, somehow, they ended with two goals), but worse than all their other ones. “It is,” Sage sighed after the Spurs match, “a disaster.” In that interview Sage said his “main principles” included “to look to get behind the opposition defence non-stop; and to press your opponents hard so you can win the ball back quickly,” Again, lovely ideas.
But Sage’s Palace were absolutely rubbish at pressing – on Opta’s pressed sequences metric, measuring “the number of open-play sequences starting in their defensive third where the opposition has three or fewer passes and the sequence ends in their own half”, they are currently bottom of the league, and what high turnovers they have managed have led to just eight shots (second-bottom) and no goals (bottom). As for getting behind the opposition defence non-stop, Opta has recorded 24 through-balls this season, which actually is the fifth-highest total in the league. They have also recorded 23 offsides. Still, we should take a minute (but no more) to mark another coach’s departure. Farewell, Pierre, and good luck. You certainly had none of it over here.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Scott Murray at 7.45pm GMT for red-hot Nations League updates from Scotland 0-0 North Macedonia.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
3 August 2026: “It has become clear to us that there is tremendous potential to make the men’s national team program even stronger. The passion we experienced from the fans throughout the [Geopolitics] World Cup only strengthened our belief in what is possible here” – Mauricio Pochettino autographs a new contract to manage the USA USA USA to 2030 because he reckons they’re going places, baby.
13 November 2026: “The opportunity to represent the USA [USA USA] crest was one of the greatest honours of my career. We are so grateful to the players for their commitment, to the fans for their belief, and to the federation for always supporting our staff and creating the opportunities to impact the culture of soccer in this great country” – turns out that it’s Pochettino is going places faster than the national team. Next stop: Manchester United!
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FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
As I have been away at a conference, giving a presentation that the MC described as ‘sobering’, I’ve missed the last few days of football, so I was very sad to read about the passing of the great Danny Kelly. Others are far better placed to give tributes to the great man, but for younger generations who can’t comprehend the football cultural significance, Baker and Kelly represented the peak of football phone-ins. Before it became people ranting and raving about wanting the manager sacked as they’ve lost a few games or wanting the club to spend another few hundred million pounds on yet more players, it was about football supporters and supporting, from fans who actually went to games. Their peak was on BBC Radio in the 1990s, and there are too many examples of their greatness, but if I had to pick one, just one to illustrate it, it would, of course, be Gordon the Dundee United supporter and his bow tie. Rest in Peace, Danny Kelly. You gave us such joy” – Noble Francis.
As they no longer seem to be ‘Dr Tottenham’, I was wondering if they had maybe passed the soubriquet on. I think the England cricket team has provided the answer (again)” – Andrew Parker.
Impressive list of kiss-off press releases (yesterday’s Football Daily) but why was Ralf Rangnick omitted from the chronological list of post-Fergie managers? Is it because Football Daily valued him as little as Manchester United fans did?” – Mike Wilner.
If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day goes to … Noble Francis. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here.
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KLOPP THINKS OF THE CHILDREN
Serbia’s match against Germany later will be played “behind closed doors” after some of the nation’s fans engaged in racist and discriminatory behaviour during matches against Greece and the Netherlands. However, a now often-used clause in Uefa’s contract means children under the age of 15 accompanied by a coach or teacher will be allowed attend at the 55,000-capacity Rajko Mitic Stadium in Belgrade. And Jürgen Klopp assumed cuddly mode when previewing the match, saying he hopes it ends up being a life-lesson for the young fans. “We’ll have to send 5,000 Serbian children home with the thought: in football, you don’t always win, but next time you’ll have another chance,” he soothed. “I don’t want to threaten anyone, but the goal is to win the game, even though it’s being played in front of children.” Given how Croatian kids were scarred when attending a similar “behind closed doors” game against England, let’s hope things don’t get quite that ugly.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Haitian security forces have regained control of the country’s main Sylvio Cator Stadium that had been under gang control for two years, forcing the national team to play elsewhere.
Harry Kane (64, pen) has sealed England’s latest win over Croatia, this time at Wembley, on the day he made history by taking ownership of his 126th England cap. That’s a lot of headwear.
Morgan Rogers reckons accusations that Cole Palmer is not committed to playing for England are are load of tosh. “It’s a lie,” roared Rogers. “He wants to be here. He wanted to get called up and he wanted to come and represent his country as he always has done. People just see it as news and say the easy thing.”
Arsenal remain in the top four of the Women’s Bigger Cup group phase table after they dug deep to hold on for a 1-1 draw at the Camp Nou.
Bruno Fernandes has said “nah” to a second new contract offer from Manchester United.
Pio Esposito’s double has inflicted a first defeat on Zinedine Zidane as France head coach as Italy (yes, Italy!) stormed back to win 3-1 at San Siro and go top of their Nations League group.
Andy Robertson insists his matching of Kenny Dalglish’s Scotland cap record of 102 later by no means brings reputational parity. “For how long the record stood, for starters, for what he achieved in his career, for the person he is,” declared Robertson. “[Friday] is another reason for our country to honour one of the greatest players that has played a game.”
And Jack Grealish is sorry. “I want to apologise to the fans and everyone at the [Everton] for not being able to help the team [for three matches in] the last few weeks,” he honked after playing in a behind-closed-doors friendly with Derby. “I love playing for this club and can’t wait to be back playing in front of you guys in an Everton shirt. See you all soon.”
STILL WANT MORE?
A revived art prize is giving the beautiful game its creative due once more, writes Emma John.
Suzanne Wrack sets the scene before the WSL’s top two collide in a Stamford Bridge showdown.
Barney Ronay on Happy Harry Kane day.
And Big Website’s readers have their say on Michael Carrick’s exit, while Andrew Beasley illustrates what is most likely to come next for Manchester United under Poch through the medium of words (and graphics).
MEMORY LANE
13 June 1986: José Batista makes history with a Friday 13th horror tackle on Gordon Strachan for the fastest-ever World Cup red card, clocked at 56 seconds. Oof! The 10-men of Uruguay dug in for a 0-0 draw that caused more pain for Strachan and Scotland as it sent them home.
